First Look or Not? A Wedding Photographer’s Honest Advice

A first look is a private moment before the ceremony where you see each other for the first time, just the two of you and me quietly documenting it. Couples ask me constantly whether they should do one, so here’s my honest advice from both sides.

Why I love a first look. The emotion is completely unguarded. There’s no audience, no one watching for a reaction, so what happens is entirely between you. Practically, it also releases an enormous amount of nervous tension, and I’ve watched couples visibly relax and enjoy the rest of the day far more because of it.

It also transforms your timeline. With a first look, we can do couple portraits and often family photos before the ceremony, which means you get to your reception and your guests sooner. In autumn and winter, when the sun sets early, this can be the difference between having beautiful portrait light and rushing in the dark.

Why some couples skip it, and that’s completely valid. For many, the moment of seeing each other as you walk down the aisle is the emotional heart of the day, and they don’t want to experience it twice. There’s also something powerful about that anticipation building all morning. If tradition matters to you, honour that.

The practical trade-off. Skipping a first look means most portraits happen after the ceremony, so we need to protect enough time in your timeline for them, ideally around golden hour. It absolutely works — I photograph plenty of weddings this way — it just needs more careful planning.

A middle ground worth considering. Some couples do a first look with a parent or their bridal party instead, keeping the aisle moment intact while still capturing something tender beforehand. Others do a “first touch,” holding hands around a corner or door without seeing each other. Both are lovely.

My honest advice. There’s no correct answer, only what fits you. If you’re nervous, want a relaxed day and value having more time with your guests, do a first look. If the aisle moment is what you’ve pictured all along, protect it and let’s build the timeline around great evening light instead. I’ll make either one beautiful.

FAQ

What is a first look at a wedding? A private moment before the ceremony where the couple see each other for the first time, away from guests.

Does a first look ruin the aisle moment? Not in my experience — the aisle moment stays emotional, it just feels warmer and more relaxed rather than nerve-wracking.

Does a first look save time? Yes, it lets you do portraits before the ceremony so you spend more of the day with your guests.

Do I need a first look for good photos? No. Both approaches work beautifully; without one we simply plan portraits closer to golden hour.